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First Name *
Last Name *
Email Address *
Phone
Address 1 *
Address 2
City *
State *

Did You See: (Please check all that apply):

Bigfoot
Yeti
Skunk Ape
Suri Cruise
Yowie
Chupacabras
Elvis
Champ
Mothman
Kevin Federline
Lizard Men
A Mysterious Beast that ate your dog/cat/tomatoes
Ishtar

Is this the first time you have ever seen a mythic beast:

Yes
No (if No please explain how this keeps happening):

Are you currently under a Doc’s care:

Yes
No (if No please explain how this keeps happening):

Please Check where the sighting took place:

Woods
Public land
Highway meridian
Someone else's land
A logging road you were parked on while making out
Behind your trailer camp
Near a stream
Near wetlands
Near Denny's
In Patterson-Gimlin's backyard
The Pacific North-West
The Pacific Ocean
Ocean Pacific at the mall
Woodstock

Is the sighting Near:*

Krispy Kreme
Dunking Donuts
Dairy Queen that sells Dilly Bars
An Indian casino joint with dollar slots
Starbucks
Bullets-R-us
A large animal Taxidermist

*Failure to have any of these necessities nearby will mean that you’re pretty much on your own because we can’t function without ‘em.

All reports will be held in strict confidence and/or until someone offers us money to put them in our next story. All reports become the property of Bigfoot Exterminators a division of Crypto-Killers Inc., and the Blame it on the ‘60’s Freud Foundation.

Have a nice day.

© All crayon drawings are copyrighted by Jake & Annies parents, and quite possibly Miss Eileen's entire 2nd grade class, and any unauthorized use of Jake or Annies crayon drawings will result in us leaving very large mythic beast poop in your yard